Change of Plan

Life is a funny thing. Earlier this week I hit a low. I was so depressed that I cried. My sadness was the combination of many things - the fact that I am very far away from most of my family and friends this holiday season; the fact that it has been cold and raining pretty much non-stop for 3 weeks; the fact that the surf has been shit; the fact that it is harder to make close friends in a more urban setting; the fact that the U.S and world politics are horrible and soul crushing; the fact that my job search is not going well... the list goes on and on.

And then, yesterday morning I woke up to a call from Sean - captain of Slow Dance - inviting me to come spend a month with them in Fiji as crew. It was a very nice way to wake up. Surprisingly, I did not accept right away. I told Sean I needed to think about it for an hour and then would call him back.

I got out of bed and told Dad that I had just been invited to go work in Fiji on Slow Dance for a month, but I don't know if I should go... And he said, "Why wouldn't you go?!" My response was: granted, I am not really happy here. I mean, I like it here, but it is not what I expected. But I feel like if I leave without figuring out why I am not super stoked on New Zealand, I will feel defeated. You know? I don't want to feel like I am running away because I don't like it here. I want to face my problems and work through them so that I can look back on my time here as positive. Plus, I want to finish my lifeguarding award and surf Shippies again.

And Dad said, This is true. But an offer like this, to be paid crew on a luxury yacht in Fiji does not come around very often. You have no commitments here and can come back to lifeguarding and surfing, besides you will only be gone a month.

This is true as well. A minute later I called Sean back and told him I was booking my ticket. It did not take much convincing, but having Dad's support is awesome. Besides, now I can scope out all the good places for when we head up to Fiji in April (or thereabouts).

I don't want to give you the impression that I hate it here - I do not. I have made friends and picked out my favorite surf spots, know that there is so much more of New Zealand to be explored and plan to do so. But given my current circumstances - that I need a job and this is bears somewhat of a resemblance to one - it would be silly not for me to accept. I love the tropics and I really, really enjoy spending time with Sean and the whole Slow Dance experience. I am ecstatic to go back, even if only for a month.

I probably won't get to surf. I might not even get to go for a dive. After all, I will be "working". I will also, however, swim in that warm clear water I have been dreaming of since I left it.